Hey Hana

Catch-Up with Peyton: Newborn Chaos & Summer House Theories

• Hana Ostapchuk Kraus

Share episode

Use Left/Right to seek, Home/End to jump to start or end. Hold shift to jump forward or backward.

0:00 | 1:01:46

Today’s episode feels like sitting in on long voice notes between my best gf Peyton and I. She’s six weeks away from becoming a mom of two boys, I’m deep in newborn life with Andie, and we’re talking about all of it - postpartum reality, pregnancy round two, sleep struggles, mom rage, identity shifts, relationships after babies, and the parts of motherhood/marriage nobody really warns you about. We also get into toddler life vs. newborn prep, things we wish someone told us, and of course all the Bravo + recent TV updates. 

Website: hanaostapchuk.com

Instagram: @hanaostapchuk

Submit your question to be featured in next week's ep!
Hey Hana Hotline: Submit your questions here

SPEAKER_01

Hello everyone, welcome into Hey Hannah. I am joined by my very best friend, Peyton Ellis. What do I call you? Jesus, we it's it does get a loop if I thought to get married.

SPEAKER_00

I know. I still pee in Ellis, legally, technically.

SPEAKER_01

Let's go. I mean you were a teacher and you're still you're Miss Ellis to everyone, so I just feel like that's you're a celebrity around town. That's what being a teacher means, really. Just going to public. I we can't I can't go anywhere in Jupiter without people coming up to you and being like, oh my god, Miss Ellis. Are you still officially in a subject? Yeah.

SPEAKER_00

It's safe. I actually expected. But since you like went straight into the motherhood thing after you've really prevented yourself from having a lot of time. I'll I'll eventually get into changing it all once.

SPEAKER_01

My baby like goes to school. So then we all have the same last name. Up until then, I'm just sort of like, you know, we're surviving.

SPEAKER_00

You don't need to have the same last name as her right now, but eventually it will come up where they're like, wait, what his last name? Sometimes when I assign him up for activities, they put my last name as his last name automatically.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00

And then I'm like, legally, that's not his last name, but that's fine, whatever. But we'll get there eventually.

SPEAKER_01

Oh man. Um anyways. So how far along are you? You're pregnant with your second. I'm just gonna tell everyone this. Peyton has baby Milo, who's almost two.

SPEAKER_00

And then you have yeah, he'll be two in September. And then sorry, I'm yawning. Yeah, please. That's just what happens.

SPEAKER_01

Do yourself a favor and yawn on mute, okay? Um, you know, what's funny is it's taken Peyton and I like three days to record. Actually, we were gonna we were supposed to record last Friday and we pushed it, I pushed that one. Then Monday, you pushed because you had Milo homesick.

SPEAKER_00

And then having two little guys and trying to line them up at the same time to record is in an impossible task. It's an impossible We have reinforcements today. This wasn't even our own doing. We have like moms and mother-in-laws and husbands.

SPEAKER_01

It's true. I was like, we have to make this happen. Normally, this these episodes are released on Wednesday, but whatever. Sorry. Uh happy Thursday, everyone.

SPEAKER_00

Friday was your fault. You were like, I want to take a walk. It's beautiful.

SPEAKER_01

Oh my god, why did I do that? Yeah.

SPEAKER_00

And then Monday was my fault because my husband was sick. And then yesterday, was yesterday? Tuesday? Wow. Yeah. What a time. It's already Wednesday.

SPEAKER_01

I know. Flies by. Anyways, what the heck was I in the middle of saying before we started?

SPEAKER_00

You were asking me how pregnant I am. Oh, yeah. That's a great question. Wow. Look it up. How pregnant am I? I think I'm just I'm like a little over 33 weeks. 33 weeks, we'll go with. Isn't it?

SPEAKER_01

So I've asked how the fur your firstborn, you're like watching every like seed to watermelon journey on the app. And then with your second, you're just like, what week am I? I have no idea.

SPEAKER_00

Firstborn, I saw sesame seed, I saw blueberry, raspberry, strawberry, I saw all the berries. This time it was like coconut. I didn't have time to check on it, and then suddenly I was just a giant fruit or vegetable or whatever snack. Currently, I am. I just happened to look out of curiosity. I am a pineapple. Oh my gosh. I'm not a pineapple. The baby is a pineapple. Sure. Although I feel also like a pineapple. Yeah, right. Giant pineapple.

SPEAKER_01

Um, yeah, how are you feeling this time around?

SPEAKER_00

Every time someone asks me, I have had really grateful, like I'm very grateful my pregnancies have been easier than some. But no matter what, I tell my husband this, like no matter what, even without any crazy complications or high blood pressure or gestational diabetes or any of that stuff, I'm very healthy. Without all that, you're still taking a bowling ball and you're strapping it to the front of you. And then you're just told to go about your day and like sleep and do all these things. So like no matter what, even with it being simple, it's just still uncomfortable. And I have a toddler now, so lifting him and like going to the park and climbing and doing slides with him and all this stuff is harder than obviously not pregnant.

SPEAKER_01

That's so well said because I just have to, I mean, so many women are like, don't you just love being pregnant? And it took me, it took me until the third trimester to just really have the confidence or lack of energy to be terribly honest with people. I was like, no, I don't love being pregnant. Like, I'm so uncomfortable.

SPEAKER_00

Um, but I've had great pregnancies, have moments where I like it because people are nicer to me. Sure. Um, like gentler to me, but physically I don't like it.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah, I that's actually a good point. When people give you attention for being so pregnant, I didn't experience that because I wasn't showing until like really my third trimester. So I'm excited to. And even then, man, you took a while you to show.

SPEAKER_00

You were and you're taller, and I think you have you hit it better. I don't know.

SPEAKER_01

It was also winter here, so I was just underneath like big puffy coats. So I only was really showing at the very end. And then in when I was in Florida and I was like a crop top queen. I loved pregnant when I was in Florida. I just would like let it all hang out and like wanted all the attention for being pregnant because I never got it in Wisconsin. The more people were like, oh my god, what do you do? The more I was like, I love this. Like, I love being pregnant. I just want people to like let me sit down all day.

SPEAKER_00

I was listening to somebody talk about a reality show, maybe it was that I was watching or a podcast or something, saying, People are so kind to you when you're pregnant. And like, don't reach, don't grab that, don't get that can of beans, I'll get them for you. Like, whatever it is. But then the second you have the newborn, they're just like don't care about you anymore. But the problem is that's when I need the most help, and that's when I need people to grab me the cans of beans. And I'm like, I didn't need you to help me and baby me through my pregnancy. Like, I'm fine. I need you now. And they and then like you're back to just being like an ugly fat whoever once you have your baby. But pre-baby, when you're pregnant, they're like, Oh, here's the door, like here after you. It's so crazy though. I'm like, it's true. What happens once you pop up a baby? That's when I really need you.

SPEAKER_01

It's it's so true. The the process of like I don't even know how to explain this. The the process of like getting used to how much my body is twisted. I I really thought that in postpartum everything would just like sort of go back to normal. And I didn't mean in terms of like my weight. I'm not talking about that. Like, I'm not talking about like fitting in my clothes, I'm talking about just like my energy levels and just like feeling like yourself relatively, yes, like even killed. Um, yeah. I'm I'm like not okay. So she Andy's nine weeks. Nine weeks old, wow, over two months.

SPEAKER_00

That's crazy.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah, it's crazy. And but you would think that um I was newly postpartum because the my new feeling lately is like insane rage. Like I have rage out of nowhere. Today I was trying to do multiple things with just one hand to see to your point. Like, I need someone to grab the can of beans for me right now because while I'm holding the the infant who can't keep its head up just yet and who's really fussy about only being held a certain angle, um, I needed to make coffee and make my breakfast. It was already like 11 a.m. and I hadn't done either, and I was like, I have to do this. I spilt the coffee beans all over the place. I ground my coffee beans every morning and the entire container went all over my kitchen because I smacked it while trying to bring it over to the actual stove. And then and then fast forward to 20 minutes later, I'm like trying to make eggs and I was trying to crack an egg with one hand over the pan. And both times the egg missed the pan and went like underneath in the stove. I just like freaking lost it. I like threw everything. Like no patience. I was like, screw this. Just like instantly in such a mood. So you're right. You know what?

SPEAKER_00

I wonder if that's how people with anger management issues feel at all the like all the time. It gives me sympathy for them. It's really hard to maintain. Yeah. It's like how do you calm down?

SPEAKER_01

It's true. Yeah, that level of rage is something I'm not used to, but um, that's when you need the the most help. It's like in the early aughts of postpartum. So are you um are you at all ex like how are you feeling about the I'm getting more nervous?

SPEAKER_00

I think first time maybe you don't know what to expect and you're just counting down the seconds and you're so excited. Yeah. Some people are, I guess, nervous for maybe labor or something like that, but I wasn't at all. I was just excited and ready to go. Sure. This time, because I've lived it, I have a little bit more nerves. I because I'm smarter now, not so naive. Right. And I know this lack of sleep that I'm I'm still so excited to meet him, but it's like there's a lack of sleep coming. And even like the birth and labor is unexpected now in my mind. I don't know how that's gonna go. And um also have taught can I just share?

SPEAKER_01

Peyton had a an emergency c-section and the birth of the case.

SPEAKER_00

I know so many women experience is like an unplanned c-section once they're there. Mine was like so last second and fast and kind of like a shock. My husband wasn't even allowed in the room, like everything just happened out of nowhere. I and my husband had to like watch me get shut in a room and was told, like, just wait here, we'll come get you after. Yeah. So I think he is nervous too. Like, it wasn't what we thought. So this time I'm like, we'll see, but I have a little nerves going in a little more than the first time. The first time I was like, let's go, baby. Like, I'm ready to fight, like, let's do it, labor. Yeah, I and then having a toddler or like having any other child, you have this other element of like, how am I gonna split my time? I don't wanna not be able to pick up my baby. So, not saying it's all negative. I'm obviously still like super excited. It just is less naive excitement as last time.

SPEAKER_01

Totally. Yeah, I get that. Your experience, I mean, was obviously anytime anyone has an emergency, anything in birth, it's it just like sucks. Like it's not fun, it's scary. As long as everything's okay with the baby. Generally, women are like, who cares? Like, whatever, it's fine, even though it was scary. Um, you had such a scary experience, but you're the way that you twist it to be like a funny story every time. Like every time you talk about it, you're always like, Yeah, my butt was in the air. And like you're just literally down the hallway.

SPEAKER_00

And every time I asked Craig if he saw into the depths of my butt, he because he was in from that angle, like he was faced my butt. And I went on all fours. Okay, I they made me go on all fours like super, super fast multiple times throughout my labor experience because the baby's heart rate kept dropping. And I guess if you go on all fours, if there's any pressure being put on the baby, causing their heart to drop, because maybe like the umbilical cords being pressed on, whatever, they say, like, oh, try to get on all fours, and then the baby, because of gravity, will get like pulled away from your body down, so then maybe it'll be able to breathe better, whatever. So they kept making me go on all fours constantly, but I'm also like partially on an epidural. So I'm like numb trying to get on all fours. And so I'm like, is anything covering my butt? Is nothing covering my butt? Is and so every time I ask Craig what he saw, he's like, Oh, you know, I was there was so much going on. He never answers my question. So I'm like, I know you saw it all. I know it. And he's not telling me. And I'm like, no, but what'd you see? And he's like, Oh, I mean, it was just like there was a lot going in, like, I wasn't paying attention to that. He always says, I wasn't paying attention to that part of you. And I'm like, you're not answering my question.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah, I can't imagine being on all fours with the air.

SPEAKER_00

And then they wheeled me down the hall on all fours, so hopefully they covered the important parts. I don't know.

SPEAKER_01

But then it was like a few short seconds later, my own.

SPEAKER_00

Oh, seconds, and he was out and he was fine. So, like, we're all good. I um and then I remember something about like Craig wasn't allowed in, but he like was running kind of after us. And then I can remember he didn't have his shoes on because like we were hanging out in the room all day hanging out.

SPEAKER_01

Oh, sure, yeah.

SPEAKER_00

And so he's like running down the hall holding his sneakers, like and trying to get them on. And he said he just remembers like finally outside the door tying his shoe and then being like, no, sir, you can't come in. He's like, But I just got my shoes on.

SPEAKER_01

That is so true. I actually forgot Peter was barefoot during all like all of that.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah. Our friend, our good friend always talks about looking down and seeing her husband's feet in flip-flops and being like disgusted by wearing flip-flops.

SPEAKER_01

While she was pushing, right?

SPEAKER_00

Yes. Like that's our her C-section. And she's like, I looked over and I just see like flip-flops with like the booties over the flip-flops. I'm just like you.

SPEAKER_01

That's the most Florida boy thing I've ever heard. It's so Florida boy. It's so funny. Oh my gosh. Anyways, well, um I've been doing some research for you. I've literally asked every woman I've spoken to who has over one child. I'm like, what's the easiest transition? Truly, everybody says every answer unanimously across the board is the second child. The one to two transition is so much easier than the zero to one transition in terms of children. I've actually asked people this question so many times. I've gotten so comfortable asking people these questions that often people think I'm asking about the age of the child, like, is zero to one easier than one to two? And people give me the wrong answer. And then I'm like too embarrassed to be like, no, I'm talking how many children are easiest to have. Yeah. Peter's even witnessed people answer this question wrong, and he's like, you have to start asking that like a better way. I'm like, I'm just different.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah. I can't. I can't. It's easier going to one child or going to two children.

SPEAKER_01

I have every everybody says that the second child is like the easiest transition, and it becomes so much more fun because you're this big unit and it's man on man and all these different things. And you know what you're doing. So I mean, like, which stage of the newborn phase are you most looking forward to?

SPEAKER_00

Cause I'm in it. The whole new the whole part of getting to just like sniff your baby and they're just there and they're a blob, and they look at you with just like love in their eyes. Like they only think of you fondly. That part is all really nice. Like they haven't thrown their first tantrum. Well, I feel like every day is kind of a tantrum, but not really. They're just upset because they don't know what they want. But yeah, they love you so much and they smell so good, and they have that baby. I don't know, something rather baby. So I love that part. Um otherwise.

SPEAKER_01

Oh wait, can I just say Andy just Andy just did the like today? Was the first time she's really getting comfortable smiling, like looking at me at me and smiling. But today was the first day she did that thing where she was sitting on my shoulder and she sort of like head wobbled and she wobbled too aggressively, and she fell into my collarbone. And you just heard this big thud, and she just like freaking lost it. I mean, she's done that before, but she'd never lost it before. Like, I'm like, oh, she's getting a personality because she just got so mad. Yeah, she got so mad that she hit my collarbone.

SPEAKER_00

That is all so cute. That it's so cute of them like learning to hold their neck up. And every time you look at them, you're so obsessed with them. Right. That doesn't really go away, but it kind of fades.

SPEAKER_02

Okay.

SPEAKER_00

Because as a newborn, they every day they're changing and they're doing something different. And like that's all the best part. Like it's so fun. And they're you're just so obsessed with them.

SPEAKER_01

So obsessed.

SPEAKER_00

They're so new and fresh and like um, but otherwise, it's to me so much more fun once they hit like one to two. They're still like cute and baby, and they need you, and they haven't really learned to say no yet or fight for the rights. They're at your like they follow whatever you want them to do, still, sort of. So you don't have to really deal with behavior. You don't have to deal with like parenting them yet, telling them yes or no, for the most part. As he's getting closer to two, it's like starting to happen. Obviously, he's starting to throw tantrums when we like leave places that he's having fun with. Oh, he might be waking up. Okay. But is he waking up? Okay. He might uh pop back down. So let's give it a second Amoundo. He might sometimes he does a little wiggle. But yeah, um, otherwise, he's so fun. He's goofy, he like understands humor now and laughs at things and runs around and figures out how to do things quickly. Like, it's so much more fun. You're gonna love ages one to two, and like that 18-month zone, like one and a half. Ugh, every mile I talk to is like they're still so cute, but they also can do so much more on their own, so you can enjoy it more and like just sit and watch.

SPEAKER_01

Yes.

SPEAKER_00

And like the idea of sitting and watching when they're newborn isn't a reality, right?

SPEAKER_01

Right. You're just like you're just holding and rocking, like trying to sleep.

SPEAKER_00

There's no sitting and enjoying and like sipping on your coffee, watching them like learn how to I don't know.

SPEAKER_01

Exists. Obviously, I'm really excited for that stage. I being in week nine right now, I just feel like we've had like such a freaking sleep regression out of nowhere. I was sort of getting so comfortable. She was sleeping almost an hour and a half to two hours every nap. And now she will only sleep like 20, 30 minutes every nap. And so to what you just said, like last night, it was after dinner, and I'm holding her all night, all day. And Peter went to go take the dog for a walk, and I was just going upstairs to go to my quarters and try to rock her again to get her to go to sleep. Like, I literally feel like my entire life right now, I'm sitting in a dark room rocking a child. I started bringing my headphones upstairs just so I could listen to a podcast. Yeah, I don't want to lose my mind. Like I'm starting to sort of lose my mind in the darkness all day, trying to like rock her to sleep. And then suddenly I'm like, where did the day go? Like, I don't get anything done. I've had like an exceptionally weird week this past week. She got some of her shots this past week, which I know people say that has an effect, but only for like a few days they get can be like a little temperamental. But also, I was having this, she went through a gross spurt last week. I just feel like I'm still feeling the remnants of truly everything, and I'm trying to get used to it. So yeah, there's certain stages of the newborn stage that are like so, so sweet. And I like when they're just nuzzled on your neck and you're like, oh my gosh, I wanna I want to sit like this forever. But also, I so badly just want to like watch my TV show. I I was talking about how I wanted to watch Sunrise House last night live. I was gonna watch the finale, I was so excited about it, and as I was getting ready for bed, I was like, in what world would I have time to sit and watch that? There's no enjoy it. Yeah, it's witching hour.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah. Um I think that I remember saying the word regression like an infinite amount of times in month zero through six because I think you're like, are they teeting? Is it vaccines? Are they sick? Are they not eating enough? Are they in are they gro in a growth spurt? Like you just keep trying to hypothesize the first six months because their sleep is so all over the place and erratic. And the second you think that you have it down, it changes again. So I would always think it must be a regression, but in reality, I think months zero through six is just a giant sleep regression. There's no real like success. You're just having a good day or a bad day, and you're trying your best to figure out what it might be, or like, is it gas? Which, like, nobody warns you about gas. Let me just tell you that. Oh my god, so true.

SPEAKER_01

It's so true.

SPEAKER_00

The knowing that I wouldn't in the baby, by the way, not in ourselves.

SPEAKER_01

Just the gas in a baby, I had no idea how much everything would affect it. And the fact it rules my world, dude. I live in Wisconsin and I can't eat cheese. It's so criminal. It's so criminal. All I want is a freaking curd. I just want like a fried cheesecurd for the other day. I was like, oh, I really could go for just like a big fat pizza.

SPEAKER_00

But I'm like, I don't want to. Hell no. Potentially, possibly maybe having gas that causes them not to sleep. And you're just like, no, I'll just never eat again. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01

All that if if that was if the rule was like, um, you have to stop eating all of your favorite things all the time in order to get your baby to sleep, I'd be like, where do I sign? How do I sign up? Even though it's all the things that I love so much, I'm like, I will do anything to have a peaceful 24 hours.

SPEAKER_00

True, sure. And I don't even, I don't even know if for myself the dairy helped or not with my son. But at some point I just stopped because I felt like it. Maybe it was a 1% chance that it was negatively impacting him. And I was like, 1%'s enough for me. We're done with dairy.

SPEAKER_01

It's a wrap. Yeah. So I I had, oh wait, by the way, I want to hear about your weekend because you told me it was your it was your um uh anniversary.

SPEAKER_00

It was.

SPEAKER_01

How was it? What'd you guys do?

SPEAKER_00

It was good. Our anniversary was actually sometime last week, but we didn't celebrate it at all until we had a babysitter because you know, no point. So we went out Friday night and we got dinner, and then we went and sat on the beach for a really long time. Oh, that's so fun. Which was so nice. And then it was just like old days. Like we literally sat there and talked about nothing, which we used to we talk, we went to a place we used to go all the time when we first started dating, and we just like walked around. Um, on Jupiter Island, not the fancy there, yeah, not the beach there, but kind of like a little private. Entrance, you can find like away from everyone. There's no one around, and we used to go there all the time we first started dating. You're almost in like people's backyards because the fantasy rich people live on Jumper Island, and you can walk though through their back yards, which is the ocean because the ocean's public at least I think you can. That's what we do. So we just hung and we hung at the beach for like an hour, and then we went and got ice cream. Sorry for your dairy problems. Yeah, full of dairy. It was perfect though. It was like such a great day. We both were saying how it was like the best one we've had in a long time because we very rarely go on dates, but when we do, they're normally in and out. Like we leave. My mom is oftentimes our babysitter and think very god bless. But we often leave her. And by the time she gets him down and she like finally sits on the couch to like turn on a show, we've only been gone maybe like an hour and a half, two hours. She's like, What are you doing in the back? Like we we get back and we're like, is he down yet? We wanted to say goodnight. She's like, What? You two get back out there. Go enjoy your date. But uh that's typically what we're doing is coming back in time to like say goodnight to him because we just can't take it. But it was our first time really like staying out for a long time and enjoying it. So it was good.

SPEAKER_01

That's so your mom, by the way. I love that reaction. Yes, I love Sarah. I know. Um, Peter and I only did one date night so far, like without baby. And that's normal. That's okay. It was the exact same thing you just said that normally happens. Like we left, we were probably gone an hour, an hour and a half. And my mom was still here at the time. My mom was like, Oh my god, you guys are home so early. And I was like, Yeah, what are we supposed to do?

SPEAKER_00

Well, what else are we supposed to do? Like send stare at each other and keep talking? We hang out all day in the house with the baby.

SPEAKER_01

It's funny you talk about date night because I've recently gone to this weird dark phase at night. You know, postpartum is all about as soon as it hits 5 p.m., you go into a weird state of mind. My current weird state of mind is that I fantasize about my old self. My not even my single self, but like my pre, just like my pre-baby self, and wondering if I'll ever feel that level of, I don't even know, like that level of confidence again, because I certainly don't feel that way right now. And not even talking about my body, but just talking about like my overall energy level was high. And I just was like, I don't know, I just feel like I'm in a weird state right now. So I lately have just been thinking and like sort of romanticizing this version of myself that was pre-marriage and baby and everything, and being like, will I ever be like that again? Like, will I ever feel that way? And it's funny, I always remind myself in those moments, all I ever wanted was the stuff that I have now. So obviously I'm moving to a central station in the middle of the night, like just having these thoughts. But and it's so normal, totally, it's so normal. And I know that it'll it'll pass. Like, this is just a season of me being so exhausted that I'm like thinking of other times of my life that really were actually so hard and like romanticizing them of putting this like stupid rose-colored lens on them.

SPEAKER_00

Anyways, my question is I keep having this like let me just remind you during those times that like all I want is to be a mom and a wife. Oh, yeah, and like I'm alone and this is miserable, and like this is the worst. And now you're like, Oh, that looked that was so wonderful. Like, what are you talking about?

SPEAKER_01

It's it's more like when Peter and I talk so often about the day we met and that time of life of our dating past. Like, we'll get into a weeded detailed conversation about that version of us. And sometimes when he talks about who I was when he met me, I'm like, wow, will I ever be her again? That type of thing. But anyways, so I had this dream, and before I get into this dream, there's a point to it because I know it's so annoying when people talk about their dreams, but I had this dream that Peter was talking to another woman, and I and I I woke up and told him this dream immediately because I was like, I'm mad at you right now. I must be able to do it. Yeah, I'd immediately be a pissed. Yeah, my subconscious had a dream. You were talking to another woman, and I put two and two together in my dream and realized it was on my old block in New York City that the they were hanging out. So I went to my old apartment and like sussed them out and was able to, I could hear them, but I couldn't see them. And I remember being like, Oh, I actually like her. Like, ugh, I'm annoyed. And then I woke up because I could hear, I could hear their whole conversation. I'm telling Peter this the next morning, and he's like, Oh, that is you going back to your old self and watching your old self. And he's like, it was really just he's like, it was really just me talking to the old you.

SPEAKER_00

It was probably just yeah, like you thinking of like a memory of you two together. Yes, and you took it as it being like a different person.

SPEAKER_01

Yes, I took it as being another woman. And so the way that he clocked that faster than I could even put two together, I was like, oh, oh my god, I'm so screwed up. Like, I don't know what this is, but like, does that that goes away, right? This feeling of like missing.

SPEAKER_00

I think you're also like you said, your confidence is weird right now. A baby has such an amazing gift of just like humbling you and being like, I'm not good at anything. I can't even get a baby to sleep. I can't even like make eggs, I can't find my coffee. Like it makes you so unable to do all the things you used to that. I do think you're suddenly like, wow, I'm I'm uh slip. I'm stuck at everything. Yeah, like what the heck? So I think that's part of it. Your confidence isn't the best, your hormones are everywhere, so like your level of depression or anxiety or stress or whatever route you tend to go, yeah, is like higher than normal. And the like you sign all these thoughts, I'm sure I had them at some point. That whole time postpartum, the first couple of months, your mind is so uh messed up and goes to such weird places. And you have the weirdest, sometimes like darkest, or sometimes just like what you did, like just odd. Like, why am I missing that was me, that still is me. Yeah. I think that that happens, and then you do get so far past it, and your brain does go back to normal, thankfully, some people quicker than others, that you almost forget that it was ever like that. Because you get to the like light at the end of the tunnel, and then you're like, Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, we did that already, like done. I'm done. So it's hard for me to even remember that I was like that. But you talking about all this, I'm like, oh yeah, I did have thoughts like that. I just am so far from it. So the good news is you get past it and you feel like yourself again. Never completely the same as yourself because now you're mom. So you're never gonna just like get home and be like, ah, what bravo show do I want to watch? What book do I want to read? Like, right, which what can I do with all this time? It's like that'll never be you again. But yeah, all those weird, dark, illogical thoughts definitely. Can't wait. Can't wait. I think that obviously for some people quicker than others, because some women really do a year later, or they're still crying all the time. And they're like, this doesn't seem normal. And at that point, it's like, okay, it's probably time to talk to someone about health. But I think you're right, you're right on schedule. Nine weeks postpartum, like everything's going as it should.

SPEAKER_01

It's true. It's all it's all very normal. I think I've been feeling this way because my weekend with Peter was it was a good weekend, but there was so much room to be active, and I couldn't partake in nearly anything. Like he had a huge event on Saturday that was this thing called the big climb here in Wisconsin, which was like this day where everyone runs up and down the stairs of Camp Randall, which is the University of Wisconsin Stadium, and you like go up and down the whole stairs all around the arena. It gives back to, you know, blood cancer research. It's like a cool event. And his business was a sponsor of it. I couldn't even go because it was like 85 degrees and it was too hot for the baby. And yeah. Plus, I had nowhere to put her. Like we everyone was running stairs. Like I couldn't just like sit with her somewhere or whatever. So I didn't go at all, which was fine. But then the next day, he had another work event where it was like a big hike around this really cool farm that he's partnering with. And I started the hike thinking I could do it. It was like a four-mile hike, but it got really hot and she just started getting fussy. And I was like, we were going like deeper and deeper into this, into the woods. And I was like, I don't, I have to turn around. I probably only walked half a mile. I went home. I already, by the way, was like huffing and puffing that entire time. I was all the way to the back. I was like, I was like nursing her while we were walking. And I just remember thinking, and I'm like covering myself. He's with all his employees, and I'm like, if I just like flash a boob to one of these employees right now, I'm gonna be so mortified. Like, so I'm just like trying to stay back, but I'm definitely having a hard time while she's nursing and I'm trying to keep up with everyone on the hike. So I turn around, go go back to the house where everyone is about to eat dinner, and then like two hours later, everyone comes back. But now she's deep in witching hour. So she's like losing her mind. She got too much sun that day. It just like I had a week.

SPEAKER_00

I mean, good for you for trying for even getting out there and trying, like with the hike. Well, I would have been like no, but that's good. You're like getting out trying to do those things.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah, and then I just have to turn around and go home with like my tail between my legs. And like it's like sweet that her and I are like, I'm like, okay, it's back to you and me, girl. Like it's like sweet that we just have all these moments that we're doing together. But at the same time, I'm like, I miss doing active things with my husband. Like, I I just want to do the like fun stuff around the city with my husband and not feel like I'm stuck. I actually can't physically do any of these things.

SPEAKER_00

In Florida, we live in just a time of constant humidity and heat, and it's just like, don't go outside. There's no hiking, there's no running up like bleachers, could you imagine? No. But I understand what you're saying because in Wisconsin, you get this huge part of the year where it's just like gray skies, cold, rainy, wet, snowy. So when it finally is nice, I'm sure that's like the highlight of your year and you want to run it outside with Peter. So for those that are from elsewhere, like Florida, and they're like, oh, you can't go out in the heat. Like, cool. It's hard for people up north I'm shore. Whereas are you right? We have a hundred percent of the time we can go outside in the year. So when you're postpartum, you're like, sweet, indoors, finding an excuse. Uh, but yeah, I can't imagine you. Yeah, I can't imagine what yeah. You only get so much time outside. Like that's you're on a calm town from now. You only get a small window. Like, yeah, from now until end of fall.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah, and spring is almost over, so it's about to just get like really hot. Which is right, which is my favorite time of year. I want to be really hot, but it's like I have to think of her and what would be best for her. And most of the time, it's like not being outside as long as I want to be outside, which is fine. Like, it's okay. But yeah, that there's been moments where I'm like, am I ever gonna enjoy being outside again? Like, will those days happen where I could just like willy-nilly be outside with her all day? And we could just be sweaty and gross together outside. But I'm like, yes, Santa, those days will come.

SPEAKER_00

Next year is gonna be so freaking amazing.

SPEAKER_01

Oh my gosh, thank you.

SPEAKER_00

Next year, she's gonna be most likely walking and wanting to go to parks constantly and like wanting to go on the hikes with you and wanting to, you know, and she'll have like these four, five hour wake windows. She will be having one nap a day. So you really only will have to coordinate your day around one central map, but you have like the whole morning and the whole afternoon to like do stuff, and it's gonna be the perfect weather any year from now, and it's gonna be such a fun time.

SPEAKER_01

You know the one thing that would ruin that if you had another baby.

SPEAKER_00

If I was pregnant, exactly.

SPEAKER_01

Don't have another baby before. Don't say that, or we'll ruin it. You can't even say that. Because the last time you said that to me was right after I got engaged. You were like, Yeah, the only thing you have to do is just not get pregnant. And I was like, totally, duh, of course. How whatever.

SPEAKER_00

Is you getting pregnant? You were like, T minus two hours later. Well, oh my god, it really it literally was two hours later. I was having a phone call with you that morning and said, just don't get pregnant. And then you were you were pregnant that day. Um you already were. Um, I mean, but get pregnant and it'll be fine. I mean you being pregnant during this time would be fine because I'm pregnant and having like the time of my life. I got pregnant right when he turned one, and we've had the best one year of his life. Like this whole year has been amazing. Um I feel like I did, but the only thing that would really ruin it is if you had an actual newborn this time next year. That's true.

SPEAKER_01

I feel like you and I have been so dark and and just like negative about pregnancy and newborn life, but obviously it's beautiful and sweet and slow and all of these great things. For real though, like Peyton was the only person in my life who was like, Oh, yeah, so this is probably gonna suck a little bit. Like, and here's where it's gonna suck, and here's where it's gonna be really great. Generally, people are like, it's isn't it just the most beautiful experience about every part of motherhood? And I know people complain about it, but like the way that you flat out were like, oh yeah, you're not gonna sleep for a long time, just like get used to it. And I was like, Oh, okay, like, really? Are you sure? And you're like, Yeah, I'm sure. Get ready. You just prepared me for it. So I'm grateful for that. So if you're a new mom listening to this, I like please don't be alarmed. This is just a really unfiltered conversation.

SPEAKER_00

But then how bad could it be? Like, I'm pregnant again, I'm having another one. Like I have a one-year-old and I'm about to pop out a second. So it's like it obviously wasn't that terrible. Right. Um, right. It was great. Exactly. It's just, I also I think for me personally, and if it wasn't like this for other people, awesome for you. But it's definitely, I think, the hardest thing I've ever done.

SPEAKER_02

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00

Like physically, emotionally, all at the same time for a length of time. It's not like one hour of my life that was really hard. It's like the longest time I've spent in just a hard stage, but also the best. Like it's the best thing you've ever done and the hardest thing you've ever done all at the same time. Yeah. But no one really says that it's the hardest thing you've ever done. Like, they just make it look easy, and then you're like, Oh, I'm a really bad mom, then I guess. Because this is hard.

SPEAKER_01

Do you think our husbands say that? That it's the hardest thing?

SPEAKER_00

Um that's a great question. You should ask Peter and I'll ask Craig.

SPEAKER_01

Both of our husbands have done Iron Man. So I think like like physically, they're gonna be like, no, this isn't the hardest thing I'm gonna do physically, but maybe emotionally.

SPEAKER_00

All these boys haven't done anything for having a baby. Like physically, they're holding like a six-pound little right nugget. Um yeah, so not physically, but I wonder if just time and like the life change you go through so suddenly, the shift going from doing what you want when you want, to then being kind of like locked down is the same for them. But I will say, no matter how involved and wonderful our husbands are, mothers do so much more. Yeah, just do they women just do more. Unless I like left, like unless I physically exited the entire situation and was like, good luck for six months, we're doing more. Like as long as we're present, we just are because our bodies are like attached to them. And yeah, it just is. I I don't know.

SPEAKER_01

Even if you're not nursing, you still are like it's just it's the weirdest thing, no matter what, as the mom in those, especially in those first six months, you're just gonna be doing more than the man, always.

SPEAKER_00

And it came out of your body. So like you already did more. Right. Um, but I will ask, I'm interested to see if this is in a list of hard things he's done, or if he's like, no, it's been so wonderful, it's been the most beautiful experience of my life. And I'll be like, Okay, never mind, forget I said anything. It's been great. No, yeah, totally. It's been amazing. That's what me and Hannah were talking about earlier.

SPEAKER_01

Oh my gosh.

SPEAKER_00

Your weekend, did you do anything fun on the weekend? No, I just told you.

SPEAKER_01

I like my weekend.

SPEAKER_00

It was just a bunch of let downs. You could name this episode if you're down for a ton of negativity and complaining. This episode's for you. Um no, I feel like we've been fine. It's fine. Everything's fine.

SPEAKER_01

Okay, so where are you at in the TV world in terms of all of our Bravo shows? Because last night I mentioned this earlier, the Summer House finale aired. I didn't even come close to watching it, although I've seen just about every weird zoomed-in clip that I would want to see as the viewer already. So it's been spoiled a little bit. I haven't seen anything.

SPEAKER_00

I haven't seen a thing from it. Can I just tell you my thoughts? Pause. Okay. First off, I've never watched, like, I don't remember the last time in my life that I watched a show live as it aired. I'm always a next air. That's true. Like in my mind, Summer House airs Wednesdays because that's when it ends up on Peacock and that's when I watched it.

unknown

Right.

SPEAKER_00

So when people were like, oh, it's coming on tonight, I'm like, but it's Tuesday, it comes on on Wednesdays. But I have to remember I watch everything like a day late. So I wasn't watching it last night, regardless, but I will be watching it tonight. And our dear friend Carly is coming over to watch it with me. She and I agreed to stay off the interwebs and not watch any clips about it. Okay. Let me just know nothing without spoiling, because I didn't even watch it. Yeah, honestly, tell me all your stuff. Honestly, this is all irrelevant when it comes to Summer House. If you've watched it, so much has happened since then, and so many scandals have taken place since then that everything is irrelevant. I don't need to watch it. This was a year ago. Like, what are we doing? Wait, so okay, the weirdest part everyone's changed, everyone's switched relationships with each other.

SPEAKER_01

So what are we even watching now? What's that? Everyone's hooking up with everybody. But yeah, the the weird part that I I was almost like, what is going on? Like the clips that I saw, everybody was sort of crying and emotional. So it looks like they're showing everyone leaving the house and like summer's over, we're leaving the house, and everyone was emotional. I don't know if that happens every season and they just don't air it. I found that to be slightly odd, but there's a scene exclusively. They're all the way back to the same city. Right. They're not like okay, yeah. Like nobody's going to like California. It's like it looks like it's giving the end of summer camp, you know? Um, but anyways, they okay, there's two scenes that stood out to me that I were all over the internet this morning. And one of them, if I blinked, I would have missed it. So I'm happy the internet showed me to pay attention during this part. Amanda and West are saying goodbye to each other, and they show West like hugging her in the way that only a partner hugs a partner. I can't explain it. He's hugging her around the head, he's holding her head very gently, and then gives her like a head kiss on the forehead. And then Sierra comes up really quickly right after them, and Amanda looks at Kyle with like sort of her hands on her cheeks, like Macaulay Coke and looks like like, oh my god, were we just almost exposed? That's what the internet's saying. It looks like a moment where uh Amanda and West were almost just discovered by Sierra, and everybody's like, that's suspicious. The next clip, which I think was just honestly 30 seconds later, where Amanda and Sierra they were crying together and saying goodbye. And Sierra was like holding Amanda's head, being like, never forget how great you are, giving her like a pep talk about how she's a badass woman and she shouldn't take crap from her husband, all this stuff.

SPEAKER_00

And then they must just not hang out a lot when they go back to the city. Like they must just not see each other often. They're like working, right? So then they're saying bye because it's like, yeah, I probably won't see you again for like a couple months or whenever we have like summer house or Bravo events, see it.

SPEAKER_01

It reminds me of a really good workfriend where you try to make plans to see each other outside of work, but you like only occasionally do because work calls for it, but not really. Anyways, so those are just not a part of each other's day-to-day.

SPEAKER_00

Um, interesting. I don't know how to feel about if there was really ever any sort of scheming between Wes and Amanda. I feel like it's just the way it was edited and cut, and everything makes it look that way. Because it's just hard for me to believe they would have the time and energy to be doing this whole like thing behind everyone's backs. I don't know. I don't know. I kind of think that they were so schemy. I don't know. It's so hard for me to believe that people are that bad.

SPEAKER_01

I I don't know. And apparently, like Wes and Sierra like hook up in in the world. I'm sure they do.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah. Well, and I'm sure they like after the show possibly maybe met up a few times or like kept hooking up, I would imagine. Right. I've had I'm wondering if at the reunion they address that at all. Like, I wonder if Sierra's like, yeah, after the show aired. I hope Andy asks, like way after the show aired, did you and Wes meet up at all or have any makeouts or hookups or like how did that take place, or were you just friends after the show? Right. Or not aired, filmed, sorry, right somewhere ended.

SPEAKER_01

It's confusing because Wes keeps talking about it. Like, like he's like, Sierra's my person, like she's like my best friend. It's so great to have her back. And then he but he like won't be in a relationship with her. So I'm just like, Do you have a disability? Like, what's your problem? Like, why like relationships are really great. I what like being single and running around town is actually not even that fun.

SPEAKER_00

It's like he's obviously in a relationship now with Amanda, and that's really hard to do because you knew you were gonna be the enemy to so many people. So I'm like, perhaps he just knew in the back of his head Sierra was never his girl. Like, even though he liked her a lot, she's beautiful, everyone wants them together, yeah. Sort of on the show. He never really was that into it. In my mind, watching it, I'm like, yeah, he's just not that into it. He wouldn't be having to like talk himself into dating her if he really was obsessed with her. I think with Amanda, he actually is kind of obsessed with her, unfortunately. I don't think it's gonna last because he's obsessed with right, and now he got her, so like we'll see how long it lasts. But I don't think he had to like talk himself into dating her. If anything, he had to talk himself into not dating her.

SPEAKER_02

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00

Um she and him in the last episode. Episode I watched. So the second to last episode, not this finale, obviously, because I haven't watched it. But the one last episode when Kyle and Carl got in the fight and blah blah blah. Yeah, the way that West like she like goes into his arms crying and he's like holding her and like and like rubbing the back of her head and her hair, which he's done multiple times and multiple. He's always rubbing the back of her hair and like putting his hands through her hair. And I'm always like, if Craig, my husband, walked in on any one of our guy friends or like his guy friends, or even my friends' husbands, like rubbing the back of my hair and like running his hands through my hair, Craig would be so weirded out.

SPEAKER_02

What are you guys doing?

SPEAKER_01

No, it's so true.

SPEAKER_00

So weird move.

SPEAKER_01

It's like if it's like if Peter were doing that to you.

SPEAKER_00

Sure, sure. It doesn't matter how close to me and you are and how much you trust me. If Peter was putting his hands through the back of my hair and like giving me a hair head massage as he's talking close to my face, you would be like, What did you do? And and kissing your forehead. I would be like, Well, that's yeah, that's like that's what this whole thing, because obviously we know fast forward a few months, Kyle and Amanda separate, but at the moment they're still a married couple. It's so odd, odd behavior. Odd, odd, no matter what, even if they weren't scheming yet, it's odd and it's intimate.

SPEAKER_01

How weird was that fight between Kyle and Carl? I thought it was like I was sort of laughing the whole time, and I saw the funniest meme because Kyle, I'm just like, I've never hated Kyle. I know that he's not a great husband. Him dropping the F bomb on his wife is like simply Unacceptable, deplorable. Unacceptable. Thank you. It's simply unacceptable. Like, yes, no, thank you. That should never happen in any marriage. Get out of the marriage, whatever. He is so funny on TV. And there was there was that moment where it was like after the fight, after him and Carl hugged and cried it out and all that stuff. They're like very bromance. He was wearing his boxers and he's standing in the kitchen in his boxers. And I saw the funniest meme. It was like it um, it was him just standing there with his arms crossed in his like turquoise boxers and his purple shirt and in an empty kitchen. And the caption underneath it said, Mom, I threw up. Like threw up, threw up spelt like fruit. Yeah, it's so funny to me because that's mom.

SPEAKER_00

He looked like a little kid. He he's always snacking in the kitchen. I don't know how he maintains the physique that he does. He's always like doing midnight snackies.

SPEAKER_01

So relatable.

SPEAKER_00

Love it. Um, I thought it was funny. It was just such a guy thing that they were able to get over it in two seconds, even though they almost just killed each other. Yeah. And they hugged it out, and then he was just like, honestly, I kept worrying that you were gonna scratch the front of my car because I just got it fixed. And I'm like, it's such just like guys, everything is so shallow.

SPEAKER_01

Right. He spent entirely too long making up with Carl though, and like not enough time talking to his own wife.

SPEAKER_00

Oh, yeah, he like did that with Carl and then took his time coming to his wife, and then he showed up to like apologize to his wife in the most heinous outfit I've like ever seen. He's wearing like a neon shirt underneath of like a white button up with like lightwash, just like his whole outfit. I was like, oh my god. I don't remember seeing that. Wow, it was so ugly. His outfit to apologize.

SPEAKER_01

Well, I'm excited.

SPEAKER_00

Co change and then you can come back and think about what you've done.

SPEAKER_01

Wait, that reminds me. Didn't you tell Craig when uh it was like your your first anniversary? You told him to put on the exact same outfit.

SPEAKER_00

No, I didn't tell him to put on the exact same outfit. I know your light is looking.

SPEAKER_01

No, sorry, yeah, the light in front of my computer is blinking so much, it's driving me insane. You're like clubbing over there. No, it's like I'm in stranger things because he's trying to communicate to the other side. Um okay, sorry. But there was a time, there was a time like the first time you and Craig went out, he was wearing an outfit that you weren't like totally atrocious, as you would say unacceptable.

SPEAKER_00

But I remember thinking I could fix clothes, so it's not a big deal.

SPEAKER_01

Right. You didn't think twice about it until your one-year anniversary, and I guess he came out of the bedroom in that exact same outfit. Yeah, do I have that story right? Yes, so funny.

SPEAKER_00

And he, I don't know if it was our first anniversary or like our second or what anniversary it was, but he came out in one of our celebrations in the outfit from our first date because I had already told him numerous times that it was atrocious. And so he thought it'd be funny to like let's go out. And I was like, that's really cute, love it. That's so funny, but go and change because we want to go out with you right now. It wasn't anything terrible I've seen worse. It's just that it had no style to it. It was like gray shorts, like Billy Bob. Um, we called people down here like barnacle, me and you, barnacle bobs, like just like beachy gray shorts with a blue, maybe like Hanes, which no, like I love Hanes clothing. So soft, cotton, love it, but like a Hanes navy blue t-shirt that didn't even like fit his body well, and it had like a pocket, like it had a pocket on the left breast, you know, and like just not a cool looking shirt. Yeah, and he had like these black sneakers, oh yeah, and like no show socks, or like maybe running like just the ankle socks, like they they're not even like cool socks, and like yeah, I just and his head was kind of shaved at the time, but like obviously since I've met him, I've gotten him to grow his hair out more, he's a better style. All his shirts fit him really well, they're like nice, you know. It's just he just I just I always like someone with it, doesn't have to be a specific style, but like a style. Yeah, yeah, like a little coolness and like and like their outfits fit him well, and also if we're going on a date, you're wearing pants. Yeah, like wear pants, like it better be jeans or pants or something. I get that it's Florida, but like wear pants.

SPEAKER_01

I I forget that that's such a Florida thing. That's such an issue down there. The flip-flop thing is so real.

SPEAKER_00

I I've still I mean if he had shown up in flip-flops, I don't know if we'd be here today. So at least he was wearing sneakers. They were like running, they were like black, nice running sneakers, and I was just like, oh it's tough.

SPEAKER_01

Um, okay, anyways, the I'm I'm so happy you burnt some craig. Good work, Craig. Yes, yes, yes, yes.

SPEAKER_00

Um, well, you came uh your husband already came with a lovely fashion sense.

SPEAKER_01

So I tell everyone this like Peter wears toe socks. That's that's drop the mic, walk away. That's actually pretty wild.

SPEAKER_00

You know what's doesn't he do it for what's his reason?

SPEAKER_01

Because he's he is obsessed with having his toes separated because it's good for your entire body, he says. Your posture included, yeah, everything. So he he goes all the way to wearing toe socks. But it's all fun and games with the toe socks until because him and I are looking for a house right now. There's so many open houses we go to where he could take our shoes off.

SPEAKER_00

So like day to day, he's in toe socks. Day to day, he's in toe socks. He's never not in toe socks, like he's never has a normal sock on.

SPEAKER_01

Now, when we know we're going to friends' houses where he's gonna take his shoes off, he'll put on like a normal pair of socks. Um and I was so happy that. He's so niche.

SPEAKER_00

I don't know anybody that wears toe socks.

SPEAKER_01

He's so incredibly niche. It's like it's so wild. This man is fascinated with like toe separators in every capacity, wide toe box shoes, like the whole thing. But it's all fun and games until we go to an open house and he's taking his shoes off while also asking about like the pipes in the basement. It's like nobody can take him seriously. Like when you're asking about how old the roof is and he's just standing there in toe socks. But, anyways, strengths and weaknesses, you know. You haven't watched Rhode Island yet?

SPEAKER_00

I have not watched Rhode Island yet. I've been hearing lovely things, although both you and my sister have said that the first couple episodes, you don't know the difference between anyone because they all look the same. It's true. So it's hard to keep up with names because it's a little confusing, but eventually, I guess that you get them down.

SPEAKER_01

Well, so I'm only in episode three, but I really love Liz the most so far. I also love watching Ashley Eye Kennedy just from her blore. She's fun to watch in a whole new dynamic.

SPEAKER_00

How is she portrayed on the show? Is it similar to how she was portrayed on The Bachelor?

SPEAKER_01

That's totally different. Her tagline is about crying a lot. So I thought that was. Yeah, I thought that was cute that she played into that. I haven't seen her, I've seen her cry a few times. There seems to be a whole plot line around her husband and his coffee shop that he owns in Rhode Island, which looks really cute, but it seems to not really pull in as much money as they thought it would. And it's really like his full-time thing, and he wants it to work, and she has a hard time with how much time he spends on it because I guess they do pretty well without it. And it's sort of his passion project that whatever. But it looks really cute. Like that whole area where they live just looks adorable, like where his coffee shop is. Rhode Island. I've always heard lovely things. Yes. I'm like, I want to. My brother lives in Rhode Island. I'm like, I want to live over there. But anyways.

SPEAKER_00

How is the relationship between Ashley and Jared pretty close?

SPEAKER_01

It looks fine, although she is always sort of wishing that he was around more because he's always at the coffee shop. From what I've seen. What's missing though is like the story. I I need them to show the story of Ashley and Jared because it's so fascinating. I remember when Ashley and Jared started dating in real life. I remember thinking anything could happen. Anyone can do anything. You could like you could just set your mind to it, you can do it. You could do it. Because for so long she was obsessed with him, and he showed, according to what producers allowed us to see, like editors of The Bachelor allowed us to see, it looked like he wasn't interested in her at all. They never edited it to make it look like he was remotely interested.

SPEAKER_00

And she would be crying saying, I'm in love with this man, and he'd be like, Oh, I feel bad for her. Like that's the vibes it gave off. Like, I'm not interested in you at all.

SPEAKER_01

And then she would choose him date after date, and he would always choose someone else. And then out of nowhere, like a year later, they're in love and they're dating. It was the most I remember being like, Oh my god, I could go be president. Anything I could do anything. I'm like, I could just go do anything. That's how I feel too. It was fascinating. I wish they showed that a little bit. Yeah, I need them to tell that story a little bit more. And you said your favorite is someone named Liz. Liz. Well, she's just funny and she seems to be the head honcho. I she's the oldest and she's close to Dolores from New Jersey, who we love. Have you seen this hockey show that everyone's watching now called like off season or something? Off campus. Off campus. Yes.

SPEAKER_00

Have not seen it. I keep seeing it advertised on whatever streaming service it's on. My niece, who is 17, she is watching it and told me to watch it. But then I've also heard from other people.

SPEAKER_01

It's probably uh pretty scandalous. I have zero interest in watching this show, and I actually can't believe from what college age. I have no idea. I've heard that it looks like an ABC family show, but it's I'm just not that season alive.

SPEAKER_00

Like college romance, like and like sexual things.

SPEAKER_01

Like I don't want to see anything. I have no interest in watching some sort of like romantic drama on my camera or on my yeah.

SPEAKER_00

I heard it's like a little smuddy. Yeah. Um, and I just don't. I'm not that season.

SPEAKER_01

They're definitely harping on the entire like smut popularity in the hockey world right now. Like, there's that series of books that does really well that's about heated rivalry was the HBO one that everyone's gonna and now this sounds like I know, and it's so sad for my husband because he's so obsessed with hockey.

SPEAKER_00

He played hockey forever, and he keeps seeing like these hockey shows advertised and gets all excited, and then I'm like, I hate to break it to you. It's a romance, right?

SPEAKER_01

It's like a sexual romance, like the least type of thing that he would want to watch.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah, they'll show like a clip of a game and like the team winning, but you're not really watching hockey. Right. Um, yeah, this off-campus thing I haven't watched, but it's just not the phase I'm in. I don't really want to see people falling in love and like their sexual chemistry right now. I'm just not into it. I don't know why. It's too boring.

SPEAKER_01

It's so boring. It's so boring. There's not a time where I've been less interested in really the majority of the content out there. Like any thriller, I can't watch.

SPEAKER_00

And then I've been able to, I was gonna say, are you able to watch any sort of true crimey stuff right now or not really? Because you're not yeah, no, we didn't watch any of that stuff for a while after we had our son. Yeah. Um, but I'm back, I'm back in. I've I was reading like a thriller a week on my Kindle at night and just like living my life, my best life, pregnant, like insomnia at night, reading about like people getting killed. I don't know. Um, I just actually watched Netflix. I think it's like number one on Netflix right now, which like I think they just do to get people to watch them, but regardless. It's called Crash. It's actually very interesting. It's about these three kids. Not kids. Sorry. It's not kids. I know it just was like eliminated in my brain. Yeah, no, they're I just say kids because their parents are talking in it, but they're like post-high school, they're all graduated, and they get the three of them get an accident. The female who was driving survives, and then the two boys who were not driving pass away in the crash. And you think it's just like, oh, that's a sad story, whatever. But it ends up being where she gets put on trial for murder because they think it was all premeditated and like planned.

SPEAKER_01

Oh my gosh, is this a real story? Is this a movie?

SPEAKER_00

Yeah, and it was like in the news and all this stuff. So then I it it's just it's a movie though, it's not like a series, so it was quick. I think it was like an hour and a half. I actually put it on yesterday because I was we were trying to do this podcast.

unknown

Oh.

SPEAKER_00

So I put it on just to like, because I was sitting here and it popped up on my screen. And I was like, I'll put something on like this until Hannah called me. And I ended up getting so into it. It was great. Oh, wow. I I mean, if you're not into that stuff, don't watch, but it's a good true crimer. Um, it's a very good true crimer.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah, I used to love the true crime stuff, but really there's something dark lurking at every corner of everything I watch these days, and I can't even enjoy life. I mean, I think I watched the Lamar Odom documentary. That was the last true crime thing I ever had.

SPEAKER_00

That sounds depressing. Like, I didn't even watch that. You're in a weird state of mind.

SPEAKER_01

Uh yeah, I would think that it was fine because I know most things about Lamar Odom, or so I thought. I didn't know that he had a child who died of SIDS, so that sent me into a freaking tailspin.

SPEAKER_00

I didn't know that either.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah, it was Sante. That's I was like, I needed to ever know. No, I had no interest. No, thank you. I don't want to know that that exists. Yeah. And then I I started watching the new movie on Netflix with Sally Field that I was so excited to watch. Oh, the remarkably bright bright creatures. Yes, I loved that book. And I always wanted Peter to read that book because it's about a talking octopus, and like it's just so freaking cute. Right up in the alley. He loves right up the sally. Yes. I'm like, Peter, it's a talking octopus. He's like, is it for children? I'm like, no, no, it's hard to explain, but it's like it's really, it's really cute. Um, it was such a good book. I was excited to watch it until I were watching it and I realized her, and this is not a spoiler, it's very much the beginning of the movie. Yes, her son has passed away. And you know, we're like watching the movie, and I realized that. And I'm just like, you know what? I actually I can't watch that. So we turned it off.

SPEAKER_00

That is something that actually was a huge change post-having kids. I could watch any sort of child, baby, whatever, any age death in a movie, and I'm disassociated. Like it doesn't affect me really because it's not my life. Like I haven't, I have nothing to relate to. Oh my gosh, when they don't tell you when you have kids, I can't, I can't watch like those videos that used to make me laugh when little kids would fall over or like fall off the bed and get hurt. It makes my heart drop and gives me so much anxiety now. I can't even laugh at like funny babies getting heart videos or scared. Like it makes me upset when parents are scaring their kids. Like, I don't even like it anymore. Yeah. Um, you read Remarkably Bright Creatures the first time, you didn't even like think about that part of it. And then now that you have a child, it's a totally different experience. It's weird.

SPEAKER_01

And Sally Field like goes to sleep every night, sad that she's home alone because her son died. I'm just like, oh my god, I couldn't get past the opening. No, I couldn't.

SPEAKER_00

So now I have no interest in watching it or reading it. I never read it.

SPEAKER_01

So I but my mom watched it and called me and was like, you have to finish it. It was such a cute movie. Did it so I'm not knocking it. Anyone out there, like, please watch the video. Feeling must fade.

SPEAKER_00

Like that feeling of being that worried must fade to me. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01

Um I only can watch Disney Play.

SPEAKER_00

Must go away.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah. Until then, I'm watching Disney Pixar.

SPEAKER_00

Until or Housewives. Anything bravo is fine. Anything bravo is so safe. It's safe.

SPEAKER_01

It's safe. That's why it's the only thing I want to talk about. Yeah. Um, anyways, well, this was so lovely. Thank you. What a pleasure. What a treat. I know. I'm so happy we were able to finally find time to talk and record it. This is great. Thank you for jumping on. I'd love to hear all of the postpartum details with number two. Obviously, I know I'll talk to you, but if you want to come back on to the podcast, hey, Hannah would love to have you down the road to hear about how the newborn stage is going.

SPEAKER_00

And I will try to be more positive than I was today. I was just trying to give people something to relate to. You know, no, no. We were we were on the same page. Well, I love you. Thank you so much for joining us. Love you too. I hope everyone has a great day. Thank you for listening. Bye, Finette.